Thursday, 4 August 2011

Sundae Girl.

"I didn’t mean it Honey." 

She tossed the gun onto the bed. A small heart shaped burn mark appeared on the cover. I looked up from the floor of the hotel room and watched her eyes playing Ping-Pong against the walls.

"Sure you didn’t. Now hand me…" I coughed up a speech bubble of blood onto the carpet at the side of my head. "Hand me the phone will’ya baby."

She looked at the smashed Nokia before flinging the hotel receiver at me like a second assault.

"Don’t be callin’ no cops you hear me." I had no doubt about her threat.

"Hello operator could you get me the," I looked up and saw her stiletto hovering an inch above my eye. "Could you get me room service?"

She smiled. Lipstick smudged like a sliced grin across her cheek. Black icicles fell from her tear stained eyes.

"I know this may sound odd but my wife is pregnant and was wandering," her smile faded, I adjusted my tone. "No she demands a giant bowl of banana jelly. Yes you’re right that is quite a normal request. Only she wants it covered with corned beef ice cream and mayonnaise."

I went to hang up the receiver before adding, "And please ask them to hurry. There’s a big tip in it."

She sat on the bed rubbing her belly with the warm gun and smiled. I couldn’t wait to be a father.


  1. This is a pretty cool post. Very very dark. Love it. No other words for it. Loooooove it.

  2. Ha thanks Johanna. It was an attempt to be funny with the language and conventions of noir. It's probably due to my inability to write noir with any quality that I attempted humour instead.

    Glad you liked it and I really appreciate you commenting on here.



Paws: The Revenge.